20 April 2011

149

A horrible example of how much I let my eating disorder screw up my life...

When I was 18 I moved out on my own and started a ridiculous habit of using one credit card to pay for all my binge eating, it was a partly a strange obsession with knowing how much money I was flushing down the toliet and partly becuase I didn't always have the money to spend on a binge. By the end of the first year I was carrying a balance of $10,000. I have been paying on that balance for basically a decade, while stupidly continuing to charge all my binges. The balance is now at $25,000. Who knows how many times I came close to paying that card off just to start racking up the debt again.

The group therapy is helping me realize that I have to deal with this debt (& the shame associated with it) before I can truly move on. I'm about to completely fuck my credit score to get out from under the debt, but hopefully this debt settlement program will help me in the long run (& be a better alternative to bankruptcy).

4 comments:

Mia Hollow said...

wow.. that doesnt sound so good. i really hope you can get through all this and start over. lots and lots of luck!
xxxxx

~Nessa~ said...

Oh golly can I ever relate! When I started this school year I had 8,000 worth of credit card debt just from when I was depressed and decided to shop. The worst part was that it only took 2 years for it to get there. I also felt soooooooo ashamed. My biggest card ended up offering me a settlement agreement, so now I only have to worry about my student debt. It's a lot of work but the weight being lifted in the end is totally worth it. :)

Fuck credit scores. It's an invention of a commercially driven economy where he who has the most credit wins. Lol. I still need a co-signer to buy a car LAWL. Meh.

Jamie said...

Ugh I soooo feel you. I'm about 30k in debt between my car, CC's, medical, and loans. And now with all this new legal shit I am screwed!! Ugh! Hope you pull threw love, I'm always here for you!

Credit Cards ARE EVIL!!!

Trinity said...

Good luck!!!