25 September 2010

135

He told me I was crazy and I was the one ruining the relationship.

Today I realized it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if I'm the bitch or if he's the psycho. Or if both is true.

All that matters is this relationship isn't working out for either of us and I'm finally taking a stand for me.

I'm off to do some apartment shopping today, I would feel more comfortable having my own place than bunking (and feeling like a burden) with my friends.

Any advice on how to talk to my son about us moving out without dad? My husband cannot talk to me without yelling, so I think this is a conversation I'm going to have to do on my own.

8 comments:

Raynay said...

well your son has got to realize that you guys dont get along, im not sure how much you shield him from your fights but even if you never ever have fought in front of him i'm sure he can figure out that mommy and daddy are upset. so i would just explain that you will be happier living somewhere else and everything will be a lot better. that he will still see his dad and they will do fun things together sometimes and he can call him whenever he wants (i guess that part depends on what your custody agreement will be). and of course that you love him very much. kids are tough. he will adjust. if its the best thing for you i can only imagine its the best thing for everyone. well maybe not your husband; whos he gonna find that will want to deal with him?? but hey thats his problem, you are on to the bigger and better my dear :) XOXOX

VictoriaCrimson said...

Just tell your son that both of you still love him very much, and that the only thing changing is the living conditions. (alter to suit the situation, of course)- but just communicate that mistakes were made (when you married his father) but that nothing was his fault.

xo
Victoria

Anonymous said...

Good for you for standing up for yourself and realizing the healthiest situation for both of you. I don't have any kids so I don't have much to offer in the way of advice, but (depending on his age) I would try to be as honest and open with him as possible, maybe?
Anyway hello again. Hope you're doing alright otherwise.

Anonymous said...

I'm so glad you're standing up for yourself. Like the people above me have said, I'm sure your son has noticed tension or arguing. Just let him know that you love him to the moon and back, but that Mom and Dad will be happier having two homes instead of one. He'll be okay and he'll see that you're happier, which will in the end make him happy as well. Good luck!

Casablanca said...

AMEN. I am so happy you are realizing all of this. I'm sorry I cant help with an advice on what to say to your son, but I'm sure what you do will be the right thing and work out for the best in the long run.

Claire said...

Well done for getting to this point, I know it can't have been easy but I'm sure your lives are going to be better because of your strength.
I don't have kids so I'm not 100% sure about how to handle it but from what I understand children have a way of turning things in on themselves, just make sure you word everything so that there's no misinterpretation, no possible way he could think he's done anything to contribute to this... and of corse that you love him! xxx

m. said...

oh.
i'm sorry it has come to this.
but you, becoming your own person, and being free, is the best thing that can happen.

your son will understand.

Mich said...

That's a tough one - explaining it to your son. Like everyone else said, just make sure he knows that both mummy and daddy love him very much. Kids are tough - the initial adjustment will be hard, but he'll get through it and be ok.

I'm trying to remember what my parents told me, but I was only like 3 years old. I'm pretty sure they just deflected any questions I had, and eventually I just stopped asking and accepted the fact that dad no longer lived with us...